MY BOOMERANG WON’T COME BACK

You know, I sometimes feel like a frustrated “paper” DJ who has plenty of long play records to put on the turntable but no time to do it.

Tonight, having a one-hour free time before my midnight bedtime, I thought now is a good opportunity as any to put one of my favorite all time songs on the “paper” turntable. As Australia was the land I grew up in as a teenager, all the songs during my stay there were like gifts from heaven to somebody who wanted to learn English by listening to songs. Now, after deciding on writing another music blog tonight, the song which burst out from deep inside me was this one….”My Boomerang Won’t Come Back” by Charlie Drake. I think what makes me love this song, besides its catchy tune, was the lyrics. I adore songs which can make us laugh because of what they say. Here, the boy who is crying that his boomerang won’t come back although he waves it all over the place is told by one of the elders of his tribe that he has to throw it before it comes back. Isn’t that priceless? Let’s hear this hilarious song together then, “My Boomerang Won’t Come Back” by Charlie Drake, an English comedian, actor, writer and singer who makes us believe that he was really the Aboriginal boy in the song who madly waves his boomerang and forgets to let go until the local witch doctor takes pity on him and informs him that if he wants his boomerang to come back he first has to throw it!

Producer: George Martin

Singer: Charlie Drake

(Oom-yacka-wurka, oom-yacka-wurka, oom-yacka-wurka)
In the bad backlands of Australia
Many years ago,
The aborigine tribes were meeting,
Having a big pow-wow.
(Oom-yacka-wurka, oom-yacka-wurka)

"We got a lot of trouble, Chief,
On account of your son Mack."

"My boy Mack? Why, what's wrong with him?"
DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back.
"Your boomerang won't come back?"

DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back,
My boomerang won't come back,
I've waved the thing all over the place,
Practised till I was black in the face,
I'm a big disgrace to the Aborigine race,
My boomerang won't come back.

DRAKE: I can ride a kangaroo (yeah yeah)
Make kinkajou stew (yeah yeah)
But I'm a big disgrace to the Aborigine race,
My boomerang won't come back.

They banished him from the tribe then
And sent him on his way,
He had a backless boomerang
So here he could not stay.

DRAKE: [Spoken] This is nice, innit? Getting banished at my time of life. What a way to spend an evening: sitting on a rock in the middle of the desert with me boomerang in me hand. I shall very likely get bushwhacked.

(An animal roars; Drake shrieks back.)

DRAKE: Get out of it! You nasty bushwhacking animal.
Think I'll make a nice cup of tea.
(Doing, doing, doing...)
Good gracious! There goes a kangaroo. I must have a practice with me boomerang: hit him right
behind the left earhole. Now then, slowly back.

Gruff voice: If you throw that thing at me, I'll jump right on your head. (It chuckles and bounces away.)

DRAKE: Innit marvellous? Got a land full of kangaroos and I had to pick that one.

For three long months he sat there
Or maybe it was four,
Then an old old man in a kangaroo skin
Came a-knocking at his door.

"Well, I'm the local witch doctor, son,
They call me George Alfred Black.
Now tell me, what's your trouble, boy?"
DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back.
"Your boomerang won't come back?"

DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back,
My boomerang won't come back,
I've waved the thing all over the place,
Practised till I was black in the face,
I'm a big disgrace to the Aborigine race,
My boomerang won't come back.

"Don't worry, boy, I know the trick,
And to you I'm gonna show it.
If you want your boomerang to come back,
Well first you've got to... throw it."


DRAKE: Ooh, yes! Never thought of that. Daddy will be pleased. Must have a go, nyuh-huh! Excuse me.
Now then, slowly back... and throw.

(Boomerang whizzes away; Sounds of a plane approaching and then falling from the sky.)

DRAKE: Ooh my God! I've hit the flying doctor. Eee-hee-hee! Can you do first aid?

Witch Doctor: Don't talk to me about first aid, boy, you owe me fourteen chickens, you know, when I learned you to throw the boomerang, you know, first things first.

DRAKE: Yes, I know that, but I mean, I think on this occasion, you know, you could be a bit more perspective...........